Disclaimer: Star Trek Voyager and all it's characters are the property of Paramount. I make no money and intend no infringement by this story.

J/7 - Angst - Some violence - Same gender love
NC-17

Do not archive without asking, please. - Feedback appreciated gb_kj@hotmailcom - preferably the constructive type. :-)

Pol - you know why this story is as much yours as it is mine ...


The Abyss Within

©  GB

“Intruder alert, deck three, eight and ten. Intruder alert, deck three, eight and ten!”

The computer, setting the klaxons on red alert, had taken the entire senior staff by surprise.

Nothing had shown up on sensor sweeps for weeks. This had just been another tedious day on the bridge when nothing seemed to be going on. 

Tuvok and his security team had quickly positioned themselves on the decks in question but the intruders were too many and after a short phaser fight Tuvok had had to order a cease-fire from his crew. The intruders outnumbered the security team.

Janeway had ordered a level ten force field around the bridge but to no avail. The aliens just walked right through it.

The Voyager crew were now being moved to cargo bay one.

The tall aliens, huge humanoids in some form of black metal armour, shuffled Voyager’s crew along the corridors much like the Kazon’s had done four years ago. If that had been an intimidating experience this was even worse.  

These aliens seemed to be more technologically advanced and more intelligent than the crude Kazon’s.

Voyager’s crew were silent, waiting for what to come next. They were standing together, carefully watching their guards. Suddenly the cargo bay doors opened and yet another alien entered the room.

The reaction among their guards revealed that he was their leader.

“Where is your captain?” he asked in a deep, hoarse voice, his narrow, pale eyes examining the crew.

“I am Captain Janeway of the Federation Starship Voyager,” Janeway answered calmly and stepped into the empty circle in the middle of the large room. “Who are you and what are you planning to do to my crew and my ship?”

“A female. Now this assignment is getting more and more interesting by the minute. I am G’rahg of the T’ruhgans. I am impressed with your ship, Captain. With some minor adjustments it will be a useful addition to our fleet.”

“And what about my crew? Do you plan to make them another nice addition?” she asked dryly, remaining composed.

He threw his head back and laughed, a silent hissing noise that sent chills down her back. She didn’t think he would give her crew the time of day, but there must be something he wanted, something she could use to bargain with him.

“Captain Janeway, I have no use for your crew,” he said disdainfully. They are weak and from what we’ve seen, not very useful in a crisis. But then again, we might not have to get rid of all of you. You, for instance seem to have courage enough for the rest of this lot.”

He stepped up to her, towering over her like a predator.

She didn’t even flinch. Instead she tipped her head back and glared at him.

“What would be your terms to spare my crew?” she asked coldly.

He grabbed her hair and yanked her close to him, almost knocking the wind out of her.

“Oh, I would no doubt think of lots of things for you to do, tiny female, but since I have no intention of letting anyone who isn’t useful live, there is no point in considering that, is there?”

“But they are all useful,” she claimed, gritting her teeth at the pain in her scalp. “They are the ones that make this ship run smoothly. They all have their special assignments and duties. Voyager could not function without all of them.”

“So.” He seemed to give her words some thought. “Then perhaps it is the Captain that is redundant?”

“As I said, we are all needed on Voyager to keep the ship running. You know nothing about our technology. You need us to run the ship.”

He bent down, his forehead almost touching hers. “You are good at your work then, Captain?”

“Yes.”

He let her go and turned to look at her crew. His eyes fell on a tall blonde woman in front. Her eyes burned with anger and she wore a cybernetic implant above her left eye.

“Does she belong to you?”  G’rahg asked, pointing.

“No, that is Seven of Nine, my astrometric’s officer. She is part of the senior staff.”

“I wonder. She is furious with me for touching you. Are you being dishonest, Captain?”

“No. Seven of Nine and I are friends and work together.”

G’rahg laughed again. “I’m not sure you’re telling me the whole truth. There is one way we could find out.”  

He pulled Janeway closer and put her in front of himself, her back to his chest.

“Look at her, Captain. She looks like she wants to slit my throat just because I touch you. Let’s see what she’ll do when I do – this.”

He lifted one of his hands from her waist and grabbed her right breast and squeezed it hard.

Janeway’s gasped from the pain, the sound resonating throughout the cargo bay. The entire Voyager crew seemed to echo it; sickened at the way this alien treated their Captain. 

Seven’s eyes burned with a blue fire that didn’t escape anyone. 

Janeway maintained her calm, didn’t even flinch after her initial gasp.

“Let me go. She doesn’t approve of how you treat me. In a way you’ve proved your point, G’rahg,” she stated, using all her command training and experience to keep the pain out of her voice.

“Ah, but I am having so much fun, Captain. Obviously your race is particular about touching certain body parts. My men are busy getting an overview of the ship, we have plenty of time.”

She knew what he was up to besides taunting Seven.

He wanted to degrade her, humiliate her in front of her crew, making them see her less like a captain and more like a … she lacked for words. If he broke her, took away her authority, he might make the crew more insecure and manageable. This appeared to be his course.

She ached for Seven. This was torture for her. She tried to send ex-borg silent messages with her eyes but Seven only stared with hatred at G’rahg. 

G’rahg’s hands unzipped her jacket and pulled it off her arms. The captain closed her eyes briefly and started to shiver. He pulled turtleneck over her head. She clenched her teeth and her fists to prevent herself from reacting to this humiliation. She was only too aware of the weapons his men directed at her crew.

G’rahg ripped her tank top in shreds, leaving her standing facing her crew dressed only in trousers and a white lace bra.

“What an enticing garment you wear underneath that strict uniform, Captain,” he purred. “I bet there are more than one of your crew members that would like to see it come off. Maybe I should have pity on them?”

“This has gone on long enough,” Janeway hissed and tried to take a step forward, away from his overwhelming body. His strong hands stopped her again and with one swift movement he ripped the bra from her small body and left her there, exposed.

Janeway glanced at Seven with burning cheeks and the astrometric’s officer’s gaze was there, not on her exposed skin, but meeting her eyes without hesitation.

Looking quickly at her crew she noticed the same thing. They were not looking at her body but meeting her eyes with loyalty, sympathy and well-contained rage.

For a short moment she thought that this was the end of her humiliation but true fear hit her when she felt G’rahg’s hands on her hips.

He tugged off her uniform trousers, bringing her panties down with them. One arm lifted her from the floor, pressing her against him while one of the guards with a snarl pulled the clothes off all the way together with her boots.

Now she was naked and couldn’t hide behind anything, even her command mask was failing her.

G’rahg held her arms trapped behind her as he turned around slowly, exposing her to the entire Voyager crew. She stumbled on her own feet, as her knees gave in. She was not blushing anymore. If anything, she was as white as death; she could feel her blood draining from her face.

“Look at your Captain, crew of Voyager! You see her in all her frailty? In all her defencelessness?” G’rahg thundered, holding on to her hands with one hand and putting the other around her narrow, vulnerable waist. “She is nothing! She is a female like any other among you. She can be mastered and manipulated like any other inferior creature.”

The crew stared at him with loath and hatred. Their Captain was now staggering in front of him, looking like she was going to pass out any minute. His grip on her was too tight; she had trouble breathing.

Chakotay was the one who first noticed her lips turning blue and her head dropping.

“You are choking her, G’rahg!” he exclaimed fiercely. “Let her go now, your little show has served its purpose.”

“Ah, another loyal crewmember.” G’rahg looked down on the slumping figure of the Captain in his hands. “She does seem to look a little under the weather, doesn’t she? You better take her then. I think she will prove to be less obstinate from now on. Even you might be able to get your way with her.”

He laughed again and pushed Janeway’s body in Chakotay’s direction.

Her body staggered a couple of steps and then she started to fall. Chakotay launched forward and caught her just in time, before she hit the floor.

 

***

  

Chakotay cradled her, one arm around her back and the other under her knees and stepped back into the crowd of the crew who loyally engulfed the command team, sheltering their exposed captain without words.

There, Chakotay handed her trembling body over to Tom Paris and tore off his own jacket and his turtleneck. Tom held his Captain with care and B’Elanna Torres, standing next to him with tears of fury in her eyes, had never seen her lover so solemn, so taken.

The engineer reached out and carefully caressed the captain’s naked arm over and over, wanting to offer some comfort.

The auburn haired woman, usually so larger than life, was lying dreadfully still.

Chakotay pulled his turtleneck over Janeway’s head. Tom gently let her feet touch the floor and the turtleneck hem fell down covering her to some degree. Chakotay put his jacket on her as well and it hang loose on her petite body. He carefully zipped it up.

Then Seven was there, pushing him determinedly out of the way.

Seven lifted her captain up, cradling her in the same fashion as Chakotay had done earlier.

“I will take care of her,” she said darkly, not allowing for any objections.

Chakotay looked intently at the Paris and then quickly caressed the Captain’s auburn, dishevelled hair before directing his ice-cold gaze at G’rahg.

“Now what?” he asked in a low, dangerous tone of voice. “Do we get down to business or do you want to undress me too?”

The entire crew stiffened, first at his bold choice of words, how he ridiculed the huge alien and then at his deadly voice. Never had the solemn, caring Commander sounded so absolutely threatening and furious.

Even G’rahg seemed taken aback for a second. He eyed his opponent with a lot less confidence and glanced at his men before addressing the smaller human.

“I suppose you agree with your Captain that we need to keep your crew on Voyager to run it smoothly?” 

“I do.”

“Then I must say you all seem suspiciously eager to become slaves. That would be the inevitable outcome.” He grinned coldly.

Chakotay’s eyes didn’t divert from G’rahg’s for a second.

“If that is what it takes to stay alive, we will,” he said.

The only thing left if they couldn’t escape or outsmart the aliens was to engage the self-destruct sequence. There was no way he or Janeway would risk this ship or it’s technology ending up in enemy hands. 

“What a spineless, dishonourable way of thinking,” G’rahg mocked with another hissing laughter. “We must of course remember that you’re a spineless, predictable species.” 

Chakotay left him thinking he got the last word, trying to lull the alien into a false sense of security. He sensed that G’rahg had a huge ego and that it could work to their advantage.

“You will all return to your duty stations,” G’rahg stated. “You will be monitored constantly via your internal sensor system. My guards will be posted all through the ship and we will soon be setting course for T’ruhga Prime.” He walked up to Chakotay. “Is your Captain conscious yet?”

“No,” Tom Paris lied from behind the Commander. “She is out cold. I think she needs medical attention. Permission to take her to sickbay.”

It wasn’t entirely a lie; Janeway was awake but had not moved a muscle since she fell into Chakotay’s arms. Tom was worried sick about his captain; she could be going into shock.

“Why not?” G’rahg answered. “Let her mistress take her there. I’m sure she will be of no use unless she knows her beloved captain is going to survive.”

Seven looked down at her precious burden.

Janeway laid there, eyes closed and hardly even breathing. The blonde didn’t even glance once at the aliens as she strode towards the cargo bay door as Chakotay and Tuvok began motioning the crew to resume their duty stations.

The crew was concerned for the captain and some hands even darted out to swiftly caress her hair as Seven passed them.

Chakotay regarded them solemnly.

They would walk through fire for their captain if necessary and he had an eerie feeling that they might just have to.


 Seven entered sickbay with Janeway in her arms and found the Doctor activated and ready to take care of her. A crewmember no doubt had thought ahead and used his or her comm badge undetected.

No aliens were present yet.

“What has happened?” asked the Doctor quietly, which was more than a little unusual for him.

“We have been boarded and the alien leader decided to try to diminish the captain in the eyes of her crew. He stripped her of her clothes and exposed her to everybody.” Seven’s voice was emotionless but her eyes betrayed the torment within her as she carefully placed Janeway on a biobed.

“And in what way did this alien think such an action would have such a purpose?” the Doctor asked incredulously.

“It could have, if the crew had not been what they are, completely devoted to its captain.”

“Yes, of course. And when it didn’t work?”

“He thinks it did. I think the commander wants him to remain under that delusion, for now.”

The Doctor nodded while scanning Janeway. “Wise move of the commander.”

“How is she?” Seven asked

“She is not unconscious. She is however slipping into shock from her ordeal.” He administered a hypospray and some colour appeared on her cheeks. “There you go, that’s better.”

“Captain?” Seven leaned over the biobed and carefully touched a pale cheek. “Can you hear me? Captain?”

Janeway’s eyelids fluttered a little and then slowly revealed her blue eyes, little by little.

“You are safe now, Captain. You are not in cargo bay one anymore.”

Seven regarded her cautiously.

The captain shuddered and her eyes darted around sickbay before settling on the blonde again.

“The crew …” Her hoarse voice trailed off.

“They are back at their duty stations for now. We have to come up with a good plan, Captain and fast. But nobody else has been hurt. Yet.”

“They all saw … saw me.”

The throaty voice was low and trembling.

“Yes. But they did not look. Your wellbeing was all they were thinking of. You are not as humiliated as the intruders think you are. You have a loyal crew, Captain. Having seen your naked body has not altered that. If anything, by attacking you in that way, G’rahg has made the crew even more determined to remove them all from Voyager. You need not worry about the crew.”

Janeway looked into the sincere blue eyes and tears in her own startled the ex-borg a little.

“Shh … do not cry. I am here for you as long as I am not summoned by anyone,” Seven said awkwardly and with a completely new soft tone of voice.

Janeway lifted a hand, searching unsteadily in the air. Seven took it in hers and held it against her chest.

“Kathryn,” she whispered. “Do not let this stop your brilliant mind or your determination to achieve your goal. I will not allow any more harm to come to you. I know you were hurt and humiliated. I hate the alien for doing what he did – but it changes nothing. You are still the captain of this ship. You are responsible for this crew and they will look to you and the commander for guidance and support.”

Janeway nodded and the tears spilled over on to her pale cheeks. “I know, Seven. I just feel so … skinless. I feel like I have been exposed down to the core of what is … me.”

The younger woman nodded.

“I can understand that. Remember the nature of this crew, Kathryn. Did you notice how many hands reached out to you when we left cargo bay one? They needed to touch you, to show you how much they care and how they despised what he tried to do.”

The captain frowned a little. “Yes, yes I felt that,” she said, her voice a little stronger. “Some of them touched me.”

“There, you see? They love you, Kathryn. Almost as much as … “ Seven went silent for a while. “Almost as much as I do,” she finished softly.

Janeway’s eyes widened. She had been aware of her own feelings for the beautiful blonde for some time, even suspected that it might be mutual, but to actually hear it was overwhelming.

“Oh Seven …” She reached for the other woman and pulled her closer. “Oh, my god …”

Seven put his arms around her, held her close to her chest.

“Rest a while, Kathryn. We need to get out of this predicament and what this crew needs to help them accomplish that, is you.”

Janeway smiled wearily through the tears.

“I will be fine, Seven. I will think of something. I always do, don’t I?”

The blonde smiled faintly.

. “Yes, you do.”


Two days later they got the order to assume the course to T’ruhga Prime. This was what the senior staff had been waiting for. Now was the time to move, to set their plans into action.

They had had three things working to their advantage.

The T’ruhgans didn’t know how well the Captain had recuperated from her ordeal in cargo bay one. They were also unaware of the fierce loyalty her crew felt towards her and they had underestimated the senior staff’s tactical skills as well as their ability to fight dirty if necessary. 

Whenever G’rahg was near Janeway she would play the vulnerable, humiliated woman he expected her to be and keep her eyes to the floor. He smirked about having her pegged down from the start as a weak female. She obviously fooled him with her performance.

Chakotay had not been entirely pleased about Janeway’s plan to cease control of Voyager. He thought her plan too dangerous and controversial and that it presented too high a risk. However, she was the Captain and he couldn’t argue with the plan’s brilliant simplicity and effectiveness.

It did expose Janeway to danger, though, but as she so firmly pointed out; danger was the name of the game in the Delta Quadrant.


 

Four days later Captain Janeway was sitting in her ready room reading routine reports when Chakotay summoned her to the bridge. His choice of words revealed only to her and the rest of the senior staff that this was it. The moment of truth was here.

Captain Kathryn Janeway to the bridge.”

He never used her first name on the comm system otherwise.

She stepped onto the bridge only to stop dead in her tracks.

G’rahg was there, sitting in her command chair. As she anticipated he was also the only alien on the bridge.

“Commander,” she gasped and tried her best to look afraid. It wasn’t as hard as she would have liked it to be. “What is he doing here? You promised me you would not hail me if he … if he …”

“So this is again the fearless Kathryn Janeway when you take a good look at her,” G’rahg mocked. “Dear Captain, what are you afraid of? There is nothing of you we all haven’t seen yet.”

Janeway blushed involuntarily, of anger really, but if this damn alien thought it was of fear, so much better. “I – I – I am not afraid of you, G’rahg,” she stuttered.

“Oh, and who do you think you are fooling, Captain?” he grinned taunting her. “All I have to do is snap my fingers and you’ll start running.”

She trembled and took two steps back. If her crew had not been in on her act, they would have been convinced of her apparent fear. But there was no way in hell she would yield to this bastard other than in his dreams.

“Chakotay …” she whispered. Another cue.

“Captain, you really don’t need to be here if this is uncomfortable for you. Why don’t you retire to your ready room and …”

Before he had a chance to finish his sentence, G’rahg rose from the command chair he was occupying. “I will escort the lovely captain to her room. I’m sure I can set her mind at ease about my intentions.”

He grabbed her right arm and hauled her behind him to her ready room.

 

***

  

As soon as the doors shut behind them everybody left on the bridge jumped into action.

Harry and Tuvok had prepared as much as they could without causing suspicion among the aliens. They had carefully collected transport signatures on all the fifty-six intruders on Voyager to be able to quickly and easily determine their location.

They now let the computer silently scan for them all and while the Captain stalled G’rahg in her ready room. They worked frantically to list the aliens, one after another.

Chakotay knew that Janeway would have to use all her diplomatic skills as well as some down right acting to not cause him to catch on to their plan to get him off the bridge and keep his mind off the fact that he had not summoned any of his guards to take his place.

He bent down and took out the six phasers Harry had managed to smuggle on to the bridge earlier and hide under Chakotay’s chair. He started to quickly hand them out to the others.


G’rahg pulled Janeway closer to him. His face was inches from her and his breath fanned over her. She forced herself to not feel nauseated and focused on looking terrified.

“I think we should continue where we left off, Captain,” he smiled, his intentions clear. “I’m used to more sturdy females than you, but your frail, white body has its own appeal.” 

“No, no, please. Don’t …” she croaked and tried to pull away. It was not hard to act scared.  Although her most inner response was to kick him where it hurt the most.

“Oh, but I will, my sweet.”

He started tugging at her uniform.

She put up a formidable fight.

Her resistance had to look real. She didn’t want to expose herself to this bastard one more time. She hoped her senior staff worked quickly out there on the bridge.

Her uniform was torn to shreds and she was getting bruised from him handling her much smaller body like a rag doll in his attempts to strip her of her clothes.

She started using her nails and managed to scratch his left cheek severely.

His response was to backhand her face and almost render her unconscious.

He tore her turtleneck off of her. Her fear was very real now.

She had not called out for help yet, had saved that option if things would get seriously out of hand. She had no idea how much time had passed but was afraid that she could not hold him off much longer.

He tugged at her trousers, scratched her skin beneath them with his rough hands. Janeway kicked and had to bite down hard on her lip not to scream.

“You are like a wild be’gratha from my home world, my dear,” G’rahg stated, breathing hard as he fought to get rid of her underwear, the only things remaining between him and his goal. “You are so much prettier, though. Your hair of fire will please my eyes for a long time, I think.”

He pulled her closer to him, again one hand in her hair and one around her waist. His mouth descended on her neck where he bit down hard.

Now she could not keep it up anymore. She cried out, a loud, heartbreaking scream that made the alien’s hands grasp tighter and his teeth sink into her neck even harder, drawing blood.

This time when she screamed again, even louder, it was in the form of a name.


The senior staff looked triumphantly at each other. They had accomplished the biggest portion of their plan and now all they had to do was get to the ready room and …

The bloodcurdling scream from the ready room made them freeze for about a nanosecond.

“Kathryn!” Chakotay was the first to react. He grabbed his phaser and ran to the door. The override only took seconds and he and Tuvok launched into the ready room simultaneously.

G’rahg knew of nothing but the pleasure of the screaming woman in his power until two phasers were pressed into his neck. He was lying on top of Janeway, pressing her into the floor beneath them.

“Get off her!”

Chakotay yanked him up and Tuvok hauled the large alien onto the bridge, targeting him with his phaser, set to kill.

“Kathryn, are you all right?” Chakotay embraced the half naked woman. “You’re bleeding.”

“He bit me,” she answered and her voice was huskier than normal. “I’m fine. Now.” She got up from the floor with his help. “I need another uniform. How are things on the bridge, Commander? Everything going as planned?”

Chakotay looked over his shoulder at her as he replicated a new uniform for her. “Yes, all of the aliens except G’rahg are gone.”

She gritted her teeth as she put on her uniform. “Good. Now it is time to deal with him,” she said as a cold rage filled her.

She strode on to the bridge; not caring that the deep wound on the side of her neck was bleeding through her clothes.

She marched right up to G’rahg and since he was at the command level, the lower part of the bridge, she was tall enough to stare right into his eyes.

“You will pay for this, Janeway,” he said threateningly. “My men won’t be so lenient with your crew when they hear about this.”

“Men? What men?” Janeway asked him in mock surprise. “Commander Chakotay, do you know of any alien men aboard Voyager?”

“No, Captain. Sensors show that there is only one.” Chakotay looked equally curious.

“Oh my … what shall we make of that, G’rahg,” she drawled and shook her head. “Computer, locate alien intruders.”

One alien intruder is on the bridge.”

G’rahg’s eyes became narrow. “It’s a trick!”

“You wish,” Janeway stated vehemently. “Harry, on screen.”

G’rahg automatically looked at the large view screen.

The sight virtually drove him to his knees.

The fifty-six bodies of his men were aimlessly floating around in space between their ship, which operated only with a skeletal crew, and Voyager.

“You bitch!” he moaned. “Damn you!”

“As you see, they got to keep their clothes,” Janeway pointed out reassuringly. “Harry, I think Mr G’rahg would like to join his men now. He seemed eager to do so just a minute ago.” 

With deadly intent she gave the order, “Energise.” 

The huge alien’s screams disappeared along with him in the tingling blue light of the transporter.

Janeway turned to Chakotay with a gasp of pain.

She had operated on cold rage and now that the task was complete and the adrenalin had begun to dissipate, the pain of her injuries, which she had refused to acknowledge, crashed upon her in a wave of agony.   She blindly reached out and grabbed Chakotay’s left arm trying to remain on her feet.

“Get me to sick bay. But don’t let the Doctor know it was my idea.”

With those words she slumped against him and as he looked down he could see a puddle of blood forming on the carpet at her feet.


Kathryn Janeway was sitting in her favourite position on the couch in her quarters gazing at the stars passing by at warp eight. She had given the order from sickbay to proceed at warp nine for as long as the warp core and their engines could take it, wanting to get out of T’ruhgan space as quickly as possible.

That had been yesterday.

She was still trying to grasp the horrendous fact that they had beamed all the aliens into space. It was the equivalent of throwing them all out the airlock.

They had debated this for hours. Was it murder?

In her mind it was, but the enemy had left them with few options.  The choice was their lives or the lives of the crew.  Not much of a choice when you drew the line that way.

Justifiable homicide?  Perhaps.  In Janeway’s mind there were no doubts about the facts.

Their enemy would have given them no quarters, no pity. It had simply been a matter of time before the crew’s usefulness to aliens dwindled which meant their demise.

In her mind Janeway fought to rationalize her decisions. 

How were their actions any different then if they had blown up the alien ship with a photon torpedo?

The technology available to these aliens had been overpowering. They had walked through level ten force fields like they didn’t exist. The only way Voyager could prevent a new attack was to make a stand like this.

What better message to the T’ruhgans then to show them what happened to those who tried to wipe out the Voyager crew? This had been the intruder’s original intention before Janeway had convinced them that Voyager was practically inoperable without its crew.

She had no proof that their out of character course of action would have the desired affect on the T’ruhgans, but each light year they put between themselves and their foe better the odds.

G’rahg’s ship had not put up a fight at all. It had powered up it’s engines and had been gone within minutes after scanning Voyager twice. No doubt seeing the dead bodies floating freely in space had convinced that the price of Voyager was too great and without G’rahg to lead them, perhaps their only choice had been to retreat.

Ultimately the responsibilities of Voyager’s actions rested with her.  The choices were hers; she had made the command decisions. It was another event to add to her list of nightmares.  Given the same choices would she have done it differently?  Could she live with her choices? The acts were now part of the past and could no longer be altered.  She would have to accept the consequences of her actions and learn to live with them.

She sighed and reached for her coffee. She was relieved of duty for another twenty-four hours. The Doctor had healed the wound from G’rahg’s teeth and all her bruises but she was still a bit sore and also prone to tremble on and off for no apparent reason.

The door chime rang.

The sound shouldn’t have been enough to make her skin crawl, but it did.

“Come in.”

Seven. The blonde entering her dimly lit quarters and she waved her over to her couch.

“Take a seat, Seven. Are you off duty, finally?”

“You wanted to see me, Captain. How are you feeling?” Seven sat down next to her, her hands neatly folded on her lap.

“I’m fine.”

“You are always fine, even if you are standing on the bridge in a puddle of your own blood, like yesterday and that after being just seconds away from being raped.”

Her eyes widened in shock at Seven’s blunt, cruel words.

Didn’t she understand that it took all of her command training, and then some, to stay calm and focused, to not fall apart?

Tears rose to her eyes and Janeway started to shiver again.

“You …” she whispered. “Damn you.”

Seven reached out and pulled her captain close.

“You cannot keep this inside. It is not healthy. You act as if it was just another mission, something you can suppress and ignore, but you are mistaken. You are hurting yourself by refusing to acknowledge what was done to you. You may try fooling yourself Kathryn, but you cannot fool me. Tuvok’s report described how close it came. Why did you not scream earlier?

She cradled Janeway in her arms and soothed her quivering body with slow strokes along her back.

“He – he was all over me … his hands were hurting me … he wanted me to feel the pain … you know,” Janeway sobbed in cropped sentences. “I knew you all needed as much time as possible and I thought I could endure it. But when he … when he …” She cried softly against Seven’s neck, throwing her arms around her.

“He bit you,” Seven filled in; trying to keep the fury over the pain and fear Janeway had had to suffer out of her voice.

“Yes. That’s when I first realised that I might not be able to fight him off. That I might have to face the rape he intended in order to save my crew and the ship.”

Janeway pressed her body against Seven’s. She wanted to absorb the younger woman’s strength and make it her own. “He made awful, awful noises and called me even worse names …”

“I am so sorry,” Seven whispered, kissing her hair. “You were never supposed to let yourself get harmed. Nobody on this ship would ever let you make such a sacrifice.” 

“Don’t you think I know that? That is why I couldn’t scream even if I wanted to, more than anything. I wanted to scream for you so bad, Seven, you’ll never know.”

“I do know. You bit both your tongue and lips to stop it. I was present in sickbay when you arrived.” The blonde caressed Janeway wherever her hands could reach. “Your face was bruised and your lip bleeding. There was blood all over your teeth and your neck. Commander Chakotay said you did scream for me – in the end.”

“I did? Yes, of course I did.” Janeway sighed. “It was awful.”

She clung to Seven, refusing to let go. Seven held her gently in her arms pressing her against her ample chest. Rocking her, soothing her. “You are safe Kathryn. I have you.”

Janeway’s tears had begun to subside as the warmth of Seven’s body permeated hers.   Never had she felt so safe, so warm, so…loved.

“Seven? Would you do something for me?”

“Anything. You know that, Kathryn.”

Burying her head into Seven’s neck she whispered, “Make love to me?”

 

***

 

Her implants must be malfunctioning.

Those words were impossible.

Janeway’s voice had been no more than a whisper.  Seven was convinced that she had not heard her properly.

“Make love to me, Seven. Or don’t you want to?” Janeway repeated.

The throaty voice had certain urgency to it, trembling in intensity.

“You know that I have feelings for you, that I desire you. But you are not well. I fear you might regret such a request later … and I could not bare it if you … He hurt you, Kathryn. You need more time.”

“It is part of why I want you to. He had his eyes all over me, grabbing me, humiliating me. I need your hands to be the last hands that touch me. I know you love me and deep inside you know how I feel. Ever since the borg queen coerced you into rejoining the collective in order to keep Voyager safe, I have been fighting against my truest feelings. You must have sensed the love I feel for you?”

Seven cupped Janeway’s chin and tipped her head back. “Are you sure Kathryn? If you are not, you might be damaging yourself, your very soul. You need time to heal.”

“I need you. You are my healer. You always have been. I need your hands on my body to erase the bad memories with good ones, new loving ones. I can’t promise I won’t cry, or not be scared, but I need your love, darling.”

Her term of endearment was all it took.

Seven bent down and gently pressed her mouth on Janeway’s. The captain’s lips trembled beneath hers, soft and yielding to her caress. Seven let her tongue brush against the older woman’s lip tentatively, afraid of scaring her.

Janeway’s arms folded even tighter around the blonde’s long neck, one of her hands straying into her hair, dishevelling it.

Seven allowed her mouth to wander along the captain’s cheeks, her chin, following her jaw line down to her neck. Janeway flinched and gasped, as in sudden fear.

When the younger woman didn’t sink her teeth in her, merely soothed her velvet skin with open mouth kisses; she relaxed against her, moaning softly.

“You are such beautiful woman, Kathryn,” Seven breathed against her moist skin. “Your hair is like fire in the night, your eyes can be so icy grey when you are upset or angry and then so calm and blue when you look at me. You are a distraction. You constantly invade my thoughts.” Leaning back on the couch Seven slowly stretched out gently pulling Kathryn with her.

Janeway smiled and shuddered under Seven’s caresses. The blonde’s hands never stopped the slow, slow movements on her back, her shoulders and down to her buttocks. She was practically lying on top of the tall lean body now, holding on to her.

“You obviously haven’t thought about what you do to me, Seven of Nine,” she whispered. “You move like a lioness and my knees give in; your voice is the first one I want to hear each morning and the last one I wish to hear each night.  You steal my breath away and you have stolen my heart.

Seven raised her head again and kissed the older woman. This time her tongue invaded the willing mouth with so much passion that she had to moan. Fire engulfed her, consumed her and all she could do was to devour the woman on top of her as her desire grew.

“Kathryn … may I undress you?” she asked gently against Janeway’s quivering lips and sat up with the auburn haired woman on her lap.

Janeway nodded.

Seven carefully pulled the large sweatshirt over Janeway’s head and gasped at the fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra. Her breasts were beautiful, like the rest of her. They were not very big, with soft, pink nipples that she simply couldn’t resist touching.

Kathryn arched against her hands and moaned again.

“Oh, that feels wonderful, Seven! Don’t stop,” she begged.

She didn’t stop. She leaned forward and kissed the pebbling nipples tenderly. Steadying Janeway with her hand, she pulled the older woman close.

When this increased her captain’s fire she started suckling them, gently at first and then more eagerly.

The other woman’s skin was like honey, with a sweet taste to it that must be all her own.

Seven cradled her in her arms and held her tight as she opened her mouth as much as possible and devoured her. How would she be able to ever let her go? 

 

***

 

Janeway’s body surged with passion in the arms of the woman she loved.

She wanted to return the pleasure but felt shy about it. It had been a long time. She had never felt this kind of passion with Mark or anyone else for that matter. That had been another kind of love.

“Seven… ” She pushed Seven back a little and pulled at her biosuit. The blonde understood and reached for the clasp behind her. The biosuit fell down and revealed her upper body. 

Janeway just stared at her.

She was so beautiful.

Her alabaster body was like a magnet, drawing her hands and lips closer and closer until she was caressing the blonde and treating her nipples the same way Seven had done to her. It was now the ex-borg’s turn to moan and arch into the intimate touch.

“Kathryn, Kathryn, you make me feel … Oh …” Seven whispered, hugging her captain closer, pressing into her.

The rest of their clothes came off in a way neither of them had any clue about.

Seven gently pushed Janeway back to the opposite end of the couch, landing her on her back.  

For a couple of seconds her eyes darkened with fear when she gazed up at the blonde, but Seven, sensing what was wrong, tenderly caressed her cheek.  As their eyes met and held the other’s gaze Janeway felt reassured her quickly, made her reach for the younger woman.

Seven leaned into the embrace and kissed her, then began make a slow journey of discovery as she kissed her neck, and breast and her stomach, letting her lips travel down to Janeway’s shivering abdomen.

“Seven,” she whispered, fumbling for her.

“Oh Kathryn, I have wanted so much. Tell me what you like, Kathryn,” the blonde urged her. “Tell me what feels good.”

“Everything you do feels good.”

“No, be specific. I ... I want this to be perfect for you. Tell me what you want me to do.” 

Janeway blushed. Nobody had ever asked her to be specific about this before. She didn’t know what to say. What did she want?

“I want you to touch me … there.” She pointed down between her thighs, awkwardly.

“With what?” Sven replied as she continued her journey of kisses. “My hands? My fingers? My mouth? ”

Seven’s voice was a bit out of breath from passion. “Tell me Kathryn. Show me how to make love to you.

“Seven …  I want you to touch my … you know, there … with your fingers, slowly, very slowly.”

Seven’s right hand traced the inside of her thighs and then she reached the damp auburn curls between them.

Janeway closed her eyes, blushing at how ready she was.

Seven’s fingers easily gained access to her wet folds, caressed them slowly, almost too slow, and then found the centre for her pleasure; the little bundle of nerves that made her cry out Seven’s name and raise her hips to meet her touch.

The blonde steadied Janeway’s hips with her other hand and kept caressing her insistently.

“Like this?”

The captain was loosing her orientation of what was up and down in the room and could only take in short gasps of air. This was agony! Sweet agony …

“Go … go inside … please …” she managed to get out between moans.

Seven complied and added first one and then two fingers inside Janeway’s quivering body.

Her silky muscles clenched at the long fingers, she was very small and it had been a long time. All it took was three or four thrusts of the loving hand before she cried out again, convulsing against the younger woman, grasping for her.

“Ah … oh, yes … yes … Seven!” she cried out.

Her body became rigid and then she slumped back on the couch, almost unconscious. She closed her eyes hard and her breath became ragged.

Her eyes opened and her crooked smile appeared.

“Oh Seven, if I had known …”

Seven smiled faintly and leaned in for a kiss.

Janeway pulled the blonde close and kissed her back with all the passion she felt for this woman. She let her tongue ravish the full lips, the soft wetness behind them.

Seven gasped and held on to her, trembling now.

“Now you tell me what you want,” Janeway whispered hoarsely. “I don’t know where you learned how to make such wonderful love to me … but now it’s your turn.”

Seven closed her eyes and moaned as the captain moved her mouth hotly over the soft white skin of her astrometric’s officer’s neck.

“I researched it, Kathryn. I … was curious.”

“Hm … you were, huh? Anything you read that sort of … struck a cord with you? … That you would like me to do?” Janeway asked, a gentle teasing tone in her voice.

Seven regarded her uncertainly.

“There are many things that can be pleasurable,” she said, a faint blush in her cheeks. “I do not have the…practical experience to know which is best suited for me.”

Janeway smiled, hugging the younger woman close.

“So, you’ll let me choose then?”

Seven nodded, looking relieved.

The captain parted the ex-borg’s long legs with her left knee. Feeling the moisture from Seven’s swollen folds against her thigh made her shiver.

“There, now slide against me, you can set the pace yourself,” Janeway smiled softly, caressing the full breasts just above her.

Seven began to undulate against her, resting on her elbows as Janeway pinched her nipples. Discovering the easy access to her captain’s mouth, the blonde took advantage of it and kissed it thoroughly.

Soon they moved in a steady, fluent motion, breathing hard against each other’s mouths, caught in the passion between them.

Then Seven was there. She began to whimper and Janeway, knowing that Seven’s first orgasm might make her feel very vulnerable and even a little scared, held her close, rocking her as the blonde shivered with pleasure.

It was right then and there Janeway realised the impact the closeness and the love had on her.

The abyss that had opened up within her soul, when G’rahg had exposed her to her entire crew and then almost raped her in her ready room, now closed.  

Seven’s love filled it to the rim.

She didn’t know how the healing had begun and she didn’t care. All she could think of was this body moving with hers in this ancient dance and the love that made it so wonderful.

 

***

 

Janeway’s sudden, unexpected orgasm startled Seven for a second before she realised that the throaty cry was the sound of the woman she loved more than life itself, coming in her arms again.

Her own convulsing body had sent the captain over the edge, taking her breath away.

Janeway buried her face in the blonde dishevelled hair, mumbling her name, over and over.

 

***

 

“Oh my god,” Janeway whispered and held on to Seven. “I can’t believe it … this was incredible. ”To be blunt, I have never come like that in my entire life. Twice? Unheard of.”

“So you mean to tell me that I was sufficient, Captain?”

“Very sufficient indeed.”

“Thank you.”

“No, thank you.”

Seven rose and lifted her captain up in her arms. She carried her into her bedroom and put her down next to the bed.

“Do you want me to stay?” she asked seriously.

“You’re kidding, right? Of course I do. Were you planning on going somewhere?”

“I do not want you to think I am assuming to much. You are a private person, Kathryn. I would prefer to remain close to you.”

“Good. Then I don’t have to pull rank.”

“You would have done that?” Blue eyes widened.

“Damn right.”

“You do not have to.”

“Good.”

Janeway pulled back the blankets.

She climbed in and Seven followed.

Soon they were both in each others arm and Kathryn sighed.  There would be other nights when the weight of command and her actions would come to taunt her.  When the memories of these past days would almost crush her. But she knew…this woman, this beautiful creature who loved her would sustain her, would see her through the dark days to come.

As Seven cradled her in her arms she felt a sense of peace.  As her eyes began to close she felt Seven’s lips gently kiss her head.   Yes, there would be other nights, but tonight she was safe in the arms of the woman she loved and sleep descended on her gently like a warm summer breeze and the last words she heard were said in a whisper, “I love you Kathryn Janeway.”

*****

The End

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